Four years ago, I was living in Florida with my ex-boyfriend when he knocked on my office door.
“Do you have $20 cash?” he asked.
It was a strange request in the middle of the day. So I raised a brow and asked why.
He told me a man had knocked on our door, asking for $20 to pay his electric bill so they didn’t shut it off. It was just enough money to put gas in his car so he could make the payment
My eyebrow raised higher. “Sounds like bullshit to me,” I said.
My boyfriend explained that the man had offered to do come back the next morning with tools to do some yard work in exchange.
Everything in me was screaming, This guy is lying. He’s not gonna come back.
I didn’t want to hand $20 to someone running a con, and I told my boyfriend as much.
And then he said something I’ll never forget:
“I’d rather spend $20 on the chance of helping someone, than miss out on making a difference.”
Suddenly, I saw my cynicism. How often I turned my face away from people who seem to be homeless or jobless because I didn’t want to see.
So I gave him the $20.
The next morning came, and the man did not return.
But I learned something that day.
There’s something more important than being right, and certainly more important than being up on my high dragon-horse judging whether someone is lying.
Lying or not, the man was in need, and I didn’t have to turn away.
***
Fast forward a few years: I was visiting Funchal, Madeira for the winter, a person came up to me in the park. They were disheveled and close to tears.
“Can you give me some change for a ride?” they asked.
Without hesitation, I opened my wallet and gave them 5 Euros.
Their whole face lit up. They kissed me on the cheek and called me an angel.
In the past, I would never have done that.
But this time, I trusted my judgment. Something in me whispered, Yes, give them money. It just felt right.
And following what feels right is more important to me than being right.
***
Which brings me to something else that felt right.
Do you remember the “fake” response I shared the other day to the real question about ,arletomg strategy? (This one.)
Well, yesterday I got an email from that very person. It was almost like they could feel me writing about them! 😱
In my “real” response to their question, I had asked them:
Are these the people you really want to be working with? Is this the work you really want to be doing? If not, go for what you really want.
Here’s what they wrote back yesterday:
“After the rebrand in June the ads did not get me good leads so I paused. I had to drop the focus on the {old market} and shift it more to {the new market and offer} which is truly how I live.
“I know my audience now. My message is clear. And thank you for your help these last 3 years.”
Look, I couldn’t have known if my hunch was right.
But it did feel right to ask, and it turned out to be helpful.
***
I’ll go out on the skinny branches here and say…
Following what feels right is always right – no matter how it turns out.
Because it’s not about being right; it’s about trusting the best you’ve got, which is what you know to do right now.
So let me ask you:
What feels right for you, right now?
What if you just did that, without questioning or second-guessing, because you KNOW It’s the best you’ve got?
Would it be wild if life was that simple?
(Hint: it is.)
Yours in love and play,
Steph
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