Today I listened to a young woman share her story.
She’s been unemployed for two years after recovering from burn out, and now she’s applying to jobs, finally ready to launch back into the job market.
She introduced her question as “not good enough” even before asking:
“I have this story that I’m worthless until I’ve made a lot of money and found my purpose in life. How do I let go of that?”
As she explored, the coach suggested that the only sure fire way to let go of a story is to see that it has no usefulness. Then letting go of it is the obvious thing to do.
And she asked the most innocent, beautiful question:
“Yeah, but is there a better story?”
It brought a tear to my eye and a soft smile to my lips. Me, too.
So much of my life has been lived trying to find a better story. A better me.
If only I say and do the right/kind/wise/good thing, the story of me will be one worth telling.
It’s such a normal thing to do. It’s such a common misunderstanding.
But why would you swap out a bad story for a better one, when the truth of who you are surpasses them both?
It’s not satisfying to my mind-storyteller. It wants the best story for everything.
How terrible Stephanie is!
How wonderful she is!
It’s the same fickle drama in a different genre.
So whatever “kind of person” you think you are, that’s a story. It’s not you.
“I’m the kind of person who always wins.”
“I’m the kind of person who plays small.”
“I’m the kind of person who changes the world.”
And it’s a story that serves a purpose for you in some way. If you’re not the kind of person who creates big things, it probably feels safe. Familiar. Comfortable.
But what if you’re neither the hero, nor the villain? What if you’re something far bigger and impossible to define?
“What do you mean, take away my stories? Who would I be then?”
Yes. Exactly.
The story comes up so fast that I often miss it:
The me those stories are moving through.
If you’d like to explore who you are underneath your stories, a DragonHeart Portal conversation is a beautiful place to begin.
Yours in love and play,
Steph 🐲❤️
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