With the inundation of artificial content (created by artificial intelligence, thanks, Chatsby) authenticity is more important than ever.
Human beings respond to real, authentic human expression. By actual, real human beings.
But authenticity has been turned into a strategy in the wellness, self-help and business worlds.
Instead of being yourself…it becomes acting like you’re being yourself. And you can even pay people to teach you how to “be authentic” in your marketing – which is the exact opposite of authenticity.
It looks like this:
- Tell stories about your flaws
- Let people see your mess – leave typos on purpose
- Confess your secrets and traumas.
- “I’m crying as I write this,” posts
- “No makeup” branding (with perfect lighting)
Now all of these things can be genuine, but as a strategy, it’s just not authenticity – it’s performance.
And I’ve seen coaches pushing people to share things that “feel vulnerable,” as evidence you’re doing it right. One coach even said, “If you have a vulnerability hangover after giving a presentation, that’s how you know you’re being really authentic.”
It’s a kind of vulnerability porn, where people get off on oversharing.
Sorry, but authenticity as a strategy is just another fake strategy. It’s just branding in disguise.
There’s nothing wrong with strategies, either, but authenticity as a strategy is dressed up need to conform to what sells.
So what is real authenticity?
It’s choosing strategies that actually feel aligned.
It’s sharing as much or as little as you like.
It’s doing things because you want to, not to get a reaction.
It’s being YOU, whatever that looks like right now, without needing to reveal the gory details.
Personally, I love sharing my messy adventures of building in public and flying by the seat of my pants. Truly.
It doesn’t feel vulnerable. It’s just plain FUN.
Believe it or not, there’s plenty I don’t share. And that doesn’t make me more or less authentic.
I follow teachers who never talk about their personal lives, and it feels completely real. If they did, it would feel like forcing.
Because ultimately, authenticity isn’t about what you do – it’s in the feeling. And only you know what’s real for you.
True authenticity arises from a connection with yourself, and a desire to connect with others.
You share because you want to, not because you’re chasing the algorithm. And sometimes, it’s quiet, understated and invisible to others.
You know it when you feel it.
Like this passage from the Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams Bianco:
“Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’
‘Does it hurt?’ asked the Rabbit.
‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful.
‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’
‘Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’
‘It doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”
P.S. If you’re ready to stop performing and start building a business that feels like you — I invite you to join us inside the IMPACT Membership, where our July theme is Unapologetically You.
We’re exploring what it really means to express your truth, attract clients without the performance, and create offers that fit you like a second skin.
Come as you are. That’s the whole point.
https://www.theawakenedbusiness.com/impactinvite/
Yours in love and play,
Steph
