I am not a technology person.
(Or am I?)
And yet just yesterday, these words came out of my mouth with surprising certainty:
“We’re going to build that (software for asychonronized team work) some day.”
I’m not a systems person.
(Or am I?)
And yet last month I built a Project Dashboard in Notion, the first version of said software.
I’m not an artist.
(Or am I?)
And yet, last weekend I led a group art experience.
What the hell is going on?
It seems I just won’t stay in the box of “things I’m good at.”
But that wasn’t always the case.
I grew up with the belief, “I’m good at everything I do.”
It sounds great at first, until you realize it really means don’t do anything you might not be good at.
So I didn’t.
Soccer? Nope.
I nearly collapsed running around the track in gym class, and there’s bound to be a lot of running.
Theater? Not allowed.
I was “just okay” in the audition my friend dragged me to. Not good enough.
I can’t even remember all the things I didn’t do because secretly I suspected I wouldn’t be good at them.
I stayed inside the lines of what I could do really well. I was small, but safe.
Thank goodness for the flukes where I tricked myself into doing things (writing, business) or fell into them out of necessity (public speaking, marketing). I somehow stuck with “being horrible” long enough to actually get good.
And now regularly do things I’m not good at. Publicly.
Like starting a presentation in Portuguese…and choking completely.
Or dancing choreos far above my skill level right next to women who learn 10x faster than me.
In the past, this would have slaughtered the fragile ego of The Girl Who’s Good At Everything.
So what changed?
Well, I finally started to realize who I really am. And that has nothing to do with my skills, experience, story or even my personality.
I am the aliveness of life in a Stephanie costume.
And that means…
I can do anything I want, with nothing to lose if it doesn’t go well.
I still bump up against discomfort and self-judgement almost every day. Sometimes it stings, but less and less.
I stopped letting my feelings set the boundaries on my life.
Instead, I follow my inner Yes or No – no matter how I feel.
Underneath the din of whatever thoughts might be swirling about in the head of any given human, if you ask them, and if they look…
…they kind of just know what they want to do. They know what their body is asking for.
You just know.
Most people override that knowing.
They check how they feel. They try to predict what might happen. They hesitate.
And they move on to the next (less scary) thing.
But when you follow that knowing, life opens up.
You try things you wouldn’t normally do. You take action before you’ve figured it all out.
And you start to discover who you really are.
Limitless.
If you’ve been circling something lately you know you want to move on, but haven’t…let’s slow down and take a look at it together.
Book a DragonHeart Portal conversation.
Yours in love and play,
Steph 🐲❤️🔥
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